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REVIEW
The singers of the 70’s song I Wanna Know What Love Is ask for someone to show them. John would say that love has been shown. He writes about love more than any other New Testament author. In the Gospel of John alone the word appears more than 55 times, and nearly 50 more times in his epistles.
In this passage, John reminds believers that from the very beginning we have heard that we should love one another. Notice his focus. He doesn’t begin with loving the world, but with loving our brothers and sisters in Christ.
But how do we know what this love truly is? How do we know if we are loving others well? We often default to behavior modification—telling ourselves to do more of this or less of that. But John points us somewhere deeper: God’s love begins with His love toward us, and reaches its intended goal when it transforms the way we love. God changes our hearts (see Ezekiel 36:26). Love received becomes love reproduced.
John gives us several ways to examine our hearts:
1. (vv.14–15) How do we know we have passed from death to life?
Because we love our brothers and sisters in Christ. Over time we notice God softening our hearts—even toward those who are harder to love. A genuine affection and compassion grows that is difficult to explain but very real.
2. (v.16) How do we know what love is?
We look to Jesus, who laid down His life for us. In response, we lay aside our own preferences to sacrificially love others. Sometimes that means stepping into someone’s mess rather than avoiding it—much like Paul did when he appealed for Onesimus in the letter to Philemon. Love moves toward people, not away from them.
3. (vv.19–21) How do we know we belong to the truth?
Our hearts may condemn us when we sin, but we learn not to remain stuck there. God is greater than our hearts and our failures. As we grow in love for Him, our prayers begin to align with His loving purposes for others—and we see Him at work.
4. (vv.23–24) How do we know that He abides in us?
The Spirit produces a growing desire to keep His commandments. “Keep” does not mean perfect obedience; it means we prize and cherish what God has said.
As we lean into the Father’s love—marveling that we are called His children (1 John 3:1)—He strengthens our love for one another. And when the church loves like that, the world catches a glimpse of Jesus.
REMEMBER
God’s love begins with His love toward us, and reaches its intended goal when it transforms the way we love.
REFLECT
Where have I recently seen God soften my heart toward another believer—especially someone who is difficult for me to love? What might that reveal about His transforming work in me?
Is there someone whose “mess” I’ve been tempted to avoid? How might God be inviting me to step toward them with the kind of sacrificial love described in 1 John 3:16 and illustrated in Paul’s appeal in Philemon?
When my heart condemns me, do I stay stuck in guilt or return to the truth of God’s greater love? How could remembering that I am called a child of God (1 John 3:1) shape the way I pray and love others this week?
RESPOND
Father,
Thank You for loving me first
and calling me Your child.
When my heart condemns me,
remind me that Your mercy is greater.
Shape my heart by Your Spirit.
Teach me the love of Jesus—
a love that moves toward others,
even in their mess,
so the love I’ve received
becomes the love I give.
Amen.
RELATE
This week, step into someone’s mess in our church family. Reach out to a brother or sister who’s struggling—send a note, grab coffee, or offer to pray with them. Don’t focus on fixing things; just show up, listen, and let God’s love flow through your presence. Small acts of care can make a big difference.
READ
1 John 3:11-24
REHEARSE
For this is the message that you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another. 1 John 3:11
REJOICE
Firm Foundation (He Won’t)
